Fake NBA trades are part of what makes the Feb. 9 trade deadline so great. But they can also be roasted when they are completely imbalanced or unrealistic.
Before you risk public shaming, here are some basic tips to make your fake trades suck less.
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Tip No. 1: Learn the Stepien Rule
The Stepien Rule, named after former Cavs owner Ted Stepien, prevents teams from trading first-round picks in consecutive years. If you want to include more draft compensation without breaking that rule, try involving first-round pick swaps or sending out multiple second-round picks.
You can see all the future pick obligations of every team over at RealGM. If you're a team looking to blow it up and receive multiple first-round picks back — I'm looking at you, Raptors and Bulls — then there are a few teams that still have multiple first-rounders available to trade.
Tip No. 2: Don't put teams in the tax
Because of outrageous spending by the richest teams this year, the tax is a big factor in trades. Owners will get a massive windfall, estimated at around $17 million, if they keep their teams under the tax line at the end of the year.
What that means is that teams right under the tax line are almost certainly not going to add much salary.
The 76ers are a particularly interesting team because they are only a little over $1 million above the tax line. Your fake trade should get bonus points if it has them shedding that amount.
Tip No. 3: Include semi-realistic targets
You already know the big names that have been rumored in trade talks. But what about the role players who can fill big holes in a roster?
Here's a non-exhaustive list of stars and decent rotation players who could possibly be moved at the deadline:
- Guards: Trae Young, Russell Westbrook, Zach LaVine, Fred VanVleet, Bradley Beal, Alex Caruso, Alec Burks, Delon Wright, D'Angelo Russell, Immanuel Quickley, Jordan Clarkson, Bones Hyland, T.J. McConnell, Gary Trent Jr., Cameron Payne, Grayson Allen, Terry Rozier, Josh Richardson, Coby White, Cory Joseph, Derrick Rose, Eric Gordon, Buddy Hield, Kira Lewis
- Wings: O.G. Anunoby, DeMar DeRozan, Bojan Bogdanovic, John Collins, Herb Jones, Kelly Oubre, Harrison Barnes, Jalen McDaniels, Josh Hart, Jarred Vanderbilt, Matisse Thybulle, P.J. Washington, Obi Toppin, Jonathan Kuminga, Gordon Hayward, Bruce Brown, Doug McDermott, Duncan Robinson, Moses Moody
- Bigs: Nikola Vucevic, Christian Wood, Andre Drummond, Mason Plumlee, Jakob Poeltl, Kelly Olynyk, Naz Reid, James Wiseman, Isaiah Hartenstein, Thad Young, Jaxson Hayes
Tip No. 4: Use Fanspo's trade machine
ESPN's trade machine was revolutionary when current Timberwolves executive Sachin Gupta created it as an ESPN employee back in 2006. Nowadays, there are newer and better options.
Fanspo's trade machine allows you to trade draft picks and add protections on those picks. It also uses BBall Index's LEBRON rating system to give a ballpark of what the value is for each side.
That machine also does a better job of checking your trade against salary cap rules, which means that you don't have to learn all of that boring stuff yourself.
Tip No. 5: Stop trading six players for one to make the salaries work
Technically, this trade works.
Realistically, it will never happen midseason. Conducting imbalanced trades would involve waiving a significant amount of players because of roster spot limitations.
Two players for one or three for two is fine. Any more than that, and your trade sucks.
Tip No. 7: Three teams max
Four-team trades almost never happen. There have been three in the past 22 years. There are too many moving parts to make those work, and let's be honest — nobody's reading all that.
Keep your trade down to two or three teams, or else it sucks.
Tip No. 8: Check the response on Twitter
There aren’t many fleecings going on these days. The value has to be pretty close for trades to actually go through.
One good measure to check whether your fake trade is balanced is to post it on Twitter and see the response. If both fan bases hate it equally, then congratulations are in order! Your fake trade does not suck.